When?

So when was the last time you really smiled from within your heart? Or had a great laughter? Not just for making someone else happy? But a laughter that made you happy? When was the last time you stopped to hear a bird chirp? When was the last time you looked up at the sky and saw the white fluffy clouds whirl at a blue background? When was the last time you were absolutely carefree? When was the last time you read a decent book? When? When? Wheeeeeeeeeennnnnnn?

You know, I can go on and on and on..... You don't have an answer do you. Did you actually gave it a thought....hmmm..no. As I am typing this ultimate crap, I can hear kids playing and chattering to themselves. Actually, after many a day, I stopped to hear them. Its just their voice and innocence that's floating into my ears. Voices are chirpy, carefree and most of it all, happy. Ummm happy. Are we happy?? I am lying in my bed and my rooms window opens itself up to a very leafy tree. Don't ask its kind, because I don't know. I never gave it a thought of knowing. Wonder why? Anyways, that tree is leafy green and currently its spring in Wisconsin, so sky is blue. You know blog, I have seen this tree everyday, but today its looks certainly seemed different. I know what you will say, same old story, I have never seen it before the way I should have. hmmmm

Its not that I am not doing well. Then what??? I don't know. I don't f*****g know!!!

You know what I did just now?? I opened up the window and let the air flow in. And what do I get as a bonus? Some distant bird singing to itself. How rewarding.....but..I don't know the birds name :( ....how ignorant of me. I will never learn....

Somebody told me once that I have a very fickle mind. I am very restless. And there's a storm running 24 x 7 in my mind. People who know me closely, won't accept that. Any day. Actually, I confess, its true. That storm strikes without warning and I drift away...................................
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........................sorry I drifted away a little...hehehe. It makes me like a fool and makes me forget myself. As I call it myself, my Seldom Self. I am forgetting what I thought of writing....

When was the last time I saw sunrise? Or maybe even a sunset? Oh!! I remember. Last November at the Santa Monica Beach, CA. I sat at the beach till the sun went down and all was left but the crimson hue in sky. It felt wonderful. There was no heavenly bodies on the beach itself to distract me. But those kinda days nowadays is rare and priceless. Sunrise. You got to be kidding. It won't cross a score, the number of sunrises that I have seen. When was the last time you saw a sunrise.

When was the last time you had a decent sleep. Or you slept even though you don't require it. Siesta?? I think I will do that now. Bye blog. I will be back soon.